Tips for Relinquishing Control:
Everyone craves a life that's perfect, but maintaining control over every aspect might not be the key to achieving that goal. In fact, relentless attempts to control can lead to unforeseen challenges. Here's why you should loosen your grip on certain facets of life and experience some well-deserved release of control.
What qualifies as a control freak?
Individuals tend to fall on different ends of the control spectrum, with some being more laid-back while others struggle to relinquish control. The inclination towards control is often rooted in upbringing, culture, and brain function.
Control freaks, according to Wikipedia, may be perfectionists safeguarding themselves from inner vulnerabilities, fearing exposure to past anxiety if they don't maintain control. A 2015 study, on the other hand, suggests that both genetics and upbringing contribute to perfectionism and control issues.
Letting go of control can be tough, especially considering that control often equates to safety, confidence, and structure in our lives. However, the consequences of your relentless quest for control may offset the perceived benefits.
The Perils of Clinging to Control
An exasperating cycle of high expectations, disappointments, and interpersonal friction can ensue when you try to control too many aspects of life. Additionally, attempting to manage the uncontrollable can exacerbate stress levels and compromise well-being.
Six Items to Relinquish Control Over
Expending energy on controlling what you cannot will deplete your resources needed to manage the controllable aspects of your life. Here are six items worth giving up control over:
- People's Affection: You cannot dictate whether someone likes you or not. Maintain a friendly demeanor but avoid exhausting yourself by trying to win over someone who is unlikely to reciprocate genuine affection.
- Others' Beliefs: People hold varying beliefs about religion, politics, or scientific truths. It is futile to try and exert control over others' beliefs; instead, engage in respectful, enlightening conversations.
- The Weather: It's human nature to complain about uncooperative weather, but it's an inevitability that you can't alter. Instead of focusing on frustrations, reorganize your plans to accommodate the weather conditions.
- Your Age: Your age is beyond your control, and dwelling on the passage of time can be counterproductive. Instead, be the best version of yourself, regardless of your age.
- Sleep Patterns: Your body requires a specific amount of sleep, and forcing yourself to adapt to less can lead to burnout. Recognize your body's needs and prioritize rest.
- Change: While maintaining consistency can be comforting, clinging to the status quo can limit growth and progress. Embrace change and adapt to evolving circumstances.
Ultimately, acknowledging the futility of attempting to control every aspect of life can offer respite from the stress associated with control freakery. By identifying areas where control is not necessary, you can lead a more balanced life.
Author
Hugo Huijer - Founder of our website, with over 100 interviews and a focus on practical advice. Based in the Netherlands, Huijer is a skateboarding enthusiast, marathon runner, and a dedicated data junkie, tracking his happiness for over a decade.
- Embracing the concept of personal growth may lead to a greater sense of happiness, as letting go of the need to control every aspect of life can encourage self-development and education.
- Focusing on education-and-self-development and striving for personal growth can be a healthier approach to achieving happiness, rather than striving for perfection and control over all aspects of life.
